Proudly identifying as an ambivert is one of those millennial things
Like avocados. Or astrology. Or“killing” every industry. Or experiencing debilitating mental breakdowns on a regular basis because society puts a lot of pressure on constantly producing, but also finding something you’re good at and enjoy and like, what if I don’t enjoy anything? Have I ever enjoyed anything before? What does enjoying something even mean? I bet only weirdos enjoy things. I should become a baker. Is bakeist a hipper way of saying it? I mean, I don’t bake much, but maybe I’m missing out - maybe I could start my own bakery - yeah, it’d be so cute - a cute little start-up bakery where I bake and the customers get baked things and bake is bake for the bake because baking bake bakes baked baked bake -
Potentially alienating introduction aside - unlike the majority of millennial phenomena, ambiversion is something I whole-heartedly embrace. For those unfamiliar with the word (first, thank you for reading my blog, Dad), “amibvert” refers to someone who expresses both introverted and extroverted tendencies.
People who identify as full extroverts/introverts (and we know which of the two is most likely to loudly proclaim their allegiance) have always seemed like weird outer space people from the Certainty Nebula to me. Most of us are not like that. Most people need some amount of alone time just as most people need to be social every now and then.
To all you self-identified extroverts/introverts out there: it must be nice being blessed from the cosmic radiation in the Certainty Nebula which allows you to discern exactly what you are. Share a little bit of that radiation with me, why don’cha?
I’ve been thinking about this a lot because I realized I make an awful lot of jokes about being a hermit.
You know those jokes you make? The ones that are self-deprecating, or catty, or about politics? The ones that are a very thin slice of Humor Prosciutto overlaying a Truth Bruschetta and everyone kind of knows it, but we’ve all tacitly agreed not to mention the Truth Bruschetta because the ensuing awkwardness/mental breakdown/murder spree would just suck? Me referencing my hermitness is one of those.
Looking back at last year (this is about as close to an end of year reflection as you’re getting from me, thanks) I conclude that I need to spend more time with people. And I need to do it in two big ways.
First - I need to hang out with people in a more simple social way. Maybe Board Games. I love board games. I love. Board games. Or maybe actually start that Dungeons and Dragons campaign. Like, for real though. Actually do that. For real.
But the main way I see myself as needing people is this: I can’t entirely work alone.
This was not a fun realization to come to.
It was quite the stale Truth Bruschetta to bite into.
Some might say.
If they were trying to exploit a motif.
I have a lot of stubborn, go-my-own-way tendencies. I want to be the guy who can do it all. If I were to record a song (and I’ve been considering it), I would want to write it, record every instrument (or at least futz with every loop to perfection), mix, and distribute the damn thing too. But I don’t have all those skills.
Same goes with writing things. It’s not that I necessarily need to co-write with someone, but I need a collaborator in some capacity because I can’t set my own deadlines. I mean, I’ve been plugging a way at one of my on-my-own projects for half a year now and it’s come along embarrassingly slowly.
I’m not exactly sure what other role this collaborator specifically needs to fill. Maybe the role is flexible. Maybe it works if they’re my boss, or they’re the star of my show, or they’re a director, or maybe even just someone who really really likes editing my bonkers shit and is dying to tell me that “Truth Bruschetta” is not happening, it has never been happening, it’ll never be happening, come back with a better metaphor please.
Did I put enough Humor Prosciutto on that Truth Bruschetta? Eh, it’s just a blog post.
Other people ground me. Other people focus me. Other people allow me a little taste of that radiation hanging around the Certainty Nebula.
Which is to not say I’m giving up on my personal projects. But I am going to refocus and I think start using collaborative projects as a momentum thang for my own stuff? Maybe? There’s a lot I haven’t thought through and the forte of this blog lies not in “thought through,” but “thinking through.”
Drew “I Never Want to Spell Prosciutto or Bruschetta Ever Again” Petriello